Some of her past would come out....

Tyler and I had been in a Inn near Trevelyan Hall. We had found out it was Seth who was behind Judith's death and while it didn't shock Tyler, as he ran the Hall and knew all of went on in and around it, it did shock myself to the very core. Seth, a man whom I had trusted with my life once, who laid down his life for me before as a sword of my own Hall, was the traitor...When we had finished our meal, out of the blue Tyler asked me, "What does he mean to you?" I had only spoken of Seth in passing usually, but Tyler inferred from my evasiveness that more than work connected us. I suppose I was still in denial about the whole thing.

I averted my eyes when I answered. "He had been a wonderful friend to me, someone I had trusted." Tyler held my eyes now with his own refusing to let me look away. "You haven't answered my question." he demanded. We have known each other since we were children and he could read me like a book, which I found at times to be quite unnerving but he wasn't letting this go. I gazed back at him steadily and said, "At one time, long ago, Seth thought that he and I would be companioned. He didn't take my refusal of him very well." I eyed him letting this news sink in.

I knew that whatever had passed between Seth and I en'vars ago had been so full of meaning at the time to him but had been insubstantial as a shadow play to me. I never realized how much my denial may have hurt his pride. It was then with utter clarity that I knew now that while there may be someday a man who might make me content, I also knew, never in a lifetime could he have rocked me in body and soul as Torr had. No one could ever fill me with both dread and longing, the need to go and to stay at the same time, until my mind was so unloosened that even I was uncertain of my own name. Only Torr had made me feel that way.

But Tyler and I had always been on a 'mission'. We had both been steered onto the mission road almost from the day we were born. We imagined we could order the world of Gor.....or a small part of it, anyway.....to our moral requirements. We were instruments of justice, and the context of that responsibility never changed. We tended to measure our self-worth in rights wronged, father's fates to be compensated for. We burned with the need for it. It made me a little frantic sometimes, although Tyler was more successful at disguising this with self-composure than I was as I tended to be on the 'excitable' side, he would tell me. We were positive thinkers. Who would not be, when convinced since childhood that we each held a reputable place in the larger scheme of things that required neither justification nor apology?

I was still distracted when Tyler spoke again. "And what about now? What do you feel for him now?" he demanded of me. I sat there for the longest time and then slowly, as I placed my hand upon his, I knew rhythmically, he felt my answer pulsing up to him through my fingertips, slow, hurting almost, I lifted my head to him, my eyes on his hard and steady...."I feel nothing but vengence and I shall have it. I want his head though not until he has felt everything that Judith must have felt." I remember my words so clearly as I meant each and every one of them.

Tyler threw his napkin on the table and got up, tugging at my arm as he stood. I couldn't move, I felt as if I were standing at the edge of a cliff, staring down below me was the Thassa spread out of infinite size, with tides and currents that throbbed in tempo with the beating of my heart. I closed my eyes and consigned myself to it, tumbling, uncertain that I would survive but unable to resist its pull.

Seth consumed me now. I could not finish a thought without thinking of him. I could not open a book before my obsession would wheel my mind away to some lurid fantasy or imaginary conversation. I couldn't concentrate anymore. Seth had taken Judith's life and now he was taking over mine....the way I looked, the manner with which I dealt with my own life. I had to make it stop because I was becoming useless to everyone and everything and there was too much to do and almost no time left. I had to settle this between us and then this reeling I felt would stop.

Tyler was on his feet looking down at me. I know he believed he understood me better than I understood myself and he was so right. He was one who could read what was in my eyes. He pulled me up out of the chair, taking coin from his pocket and without counting, he tossed it onto the table, then steered me out of the Inn. He quickly took me back to the Hall, walking me into his office, shutting and locking the door behind him.

I turned to face him, his eyes remained fastened to mine, not lingering on any details, he said loudly and firmly," Sin, you will NOT go after Seth yourself...do you understand me? We will work together to draw him out. I will get in touch with Kane and a few others besides our own men but this must remain quiet in order to pull off and you HAVE to stay in control. You have a son to protect, besides, remember who you ARE!!" He continued to yell and I remember hearing him but not feeling anything as he said, "If you go after Seth on your own and he doesn't make you pay for it, trust me when I say, that I WILL!!" I simply nodded my head, all I could think of was revenge. It is sweet. Don't let anyone tell you different...


 

Quick fixes for what ails you.

Anesthetics – Frobicain, Serum, Capture Scent, Tassa Powder - reddish powder mixed with red wine will render the consumer unconcious, Sleeping Powder - an amber fluid, add water, shake, the mixture should turn blue

Antibiotic – Echinacea, Garlic, Golden Seal, Agrimony, White Sage, Peppermint, Healing Salve, Athelas salve, Dried and pressed Dina petals steeped as tea, to ease the weary, to offset contamination of a wound or surgeon's cut, and to aid recovery.

Antiseptic – Calendula, Eucalyptus, Bergamot, Sterile Water, Fenugreek

Birth – Black Haw (afterbirth pain), Cramp Bark (afterbirth expel), Fenugreek (induce labor), Fenugreek (speed delivery), Columbine (speed delivery), Red Raspberry (ease delivery)

Bleeding - Tubers - grown in the falls. When dried, crushed, and mixed with water, it makes a good pack and aids in the stopping of external bleeding

Blood Clots - Matchweed - an anti-coagulant

Fertility - Breeding Wine, Sip root: This very bitter root with a contraceptive effect is used in the cities as the key ingredient in slave wine for lasting protection. Even in its unprepared form, sip root can be chewed raw and it will act as a contraceptive for about three to four months.

Headache – Willow

Hemorrhage – Nettles

Internal hemorrhaging - Cramp Bark

Miscarriage prevention - Black Haw, Hawthorn

Morning sickness – Cloves, Ginger, Wild Yam

Nausea – Valerian- Used for nausea (can be used as a drink, powder or pill)

Pain - Kanda, Willow, Mud Packs, Chamomile, Blue Short Grass, Lavenia, Wylow, Valerian, Arro: A tea made of this herb, Blue Short Grass: Found growing under the falls. When dried and ground, it has numbing properties, Valerian - a very stong painkiller (as an injection, pill or oral or topical medication)

Rashes - Coriander, Borage, Elecampane, Olive, Bergament Salve

Sedative – Tassa Powder

Sprains – Carrot, Comfrey, Sage Mudpacks - when packed around a sprain it should help with pain and swelling

Toothache – Cloves

Vomiting – Brak Bush: chew the leaves to induce